|My new novel, The Puppet Master, is|
inspired by my childhood in Indonesia
Hope is my antidote. The Puppet Master has enjoyed rave reviews from my harshest critics (my husband and my mum) so I'm feeling confident... or at least I was until I pressed the 'send' icon on the email. Whoosh! and suddenly the doubts came crowding in. Should have done one more edit, should have tightened up the third chapter, should have waited a bit longer... damn it!
I try to teach my children not to be afraid of failure, but have I learnt myself to deal with setbacks? Rejection hurts (and especially so when you kick a cupboard barefoot as I did the last time someone turned me down). But then that hackneyed phrase comes back to haunt me: nothing ventured, nothing gained. The trick is to kid yourself into feeling a little bit heroic. Look at me - I've sent my book off to three literary agents - how very daring! Carpe diem, carpe librum!
Over the next few months, I will no doubt spin through this cycle of optimism and self-reproach more times than a tumble-drier. At the very least, I should feel alive in an emotional sense - if hope, dread and self-absorption can be interpreted as vital signs. So it's adieu little book and fare thee well in the big old world outside my laptop. Just don't forget to call home once in a while.
To read an extract of The Puppet Master, click here.
To read comments about this post on Facebook, click here.
FURTHER READINGA Sister for Margot by Emma Clark Lam
A wartime romance between an actress and a naval officer has repercussions forty years later when Ruby, an orphaned teenager, goes in search of her missing relative.